Step Away From the Scotch

You know what we're talking about. We all know at least one person, or have at least seen someone, who has blatantly crossed the line when it comes to drinking scotch. DC Scotch Chick's first experience with such an individual was ironically the first time she had a single malt herself. She mentions this because, even without a knowledge of how to care for a single malt, she at least knew not to abuse it. And she does mean abuse.

Let's go back a moment in time to that experience. DC Scotch Chick had just spent the afternoon with CA Scotch Chick discovering the joys of single malt sampling (see How the Scotch Chix Hooked Up), when the Scotch Gents and their guests arrived. Let the record show that the Scotch Chix were the only ladies present. CA Scotch Chick generously poured a Bruichladdich 10 for all present. After an intense day of conference panels and presentations, everyone was in much need of a drink. The men were very impressed, and DC Scotch Chick had fallen in love---with the Scotch, that is. One needn't have been a genius to know that this was good stuff - expensive stuff.

Consequently, when one prominent panel member (a man no less) started to pour DIET COKE into his glass of Bruichladdich, DC Scotch Chick let out a gasp. Without stopping to think she exclaimed, "You're not even a Girl!" As soon as she had spoken she realized that she had just made a move that could be detrimental to DC Scotch Gent's career, and she was quickly relieved when the other guests laughed and started razzing the panel member as well. Whew!

However, this raises an important question. What is one to do when a great bottle of scotch is being poured -- and the recipient could not care less whether it's a decent dram? Should one keep a bottle of the cheap stuff around? That doesn't seem very hospitable – "Here, you have this cheap disgusting stuff while we will all have the finest of liquids." Should the Chix refuse to serve soft drinks or other mixers to remove this temptation? This doesn’t seem fair to the non-drinkers and designated drivers. If an individual really does enjoy ruining his or her drink is it even one's place to stop them? Oh, the perils of trying to be the perfect hostess! It is quite a dilemma. If anyone has discovered an answer to any of these questions please let us know.

FYI: DC Scotch Gent is still employed and able to buy DC Scotch Chick bottles of single malt whisky on a regular basis.